Mindfulness Made Easy Read online

  ‘This is an inspiring book. Ed Halliwell shows how an ancient wisdom, carefully tested by the best methods of modern clinical science, can become a trusted resource for the 21st century.’

  MARK WILLIAMS, EMERITUS PROFESSOR OF CLINICAL PSYCHOLOGY, UNIVERSITY OF OXFORD, AUTHOR OF MINDFULNESS: A PRACTICAL GUIDE TO FINDING PEACE IN A FRANTIC WORLD

  ‘Mindfulness involves an honest and courageous openness to the experience of being human in the present moment. Ed Halliwell knows the theory and practice of this curiously unfamiliar terrain inside out. The result is a practical and helpful guidebook, charmingly punctuated with luminous psychological and philosophical insight.’

  DR JONATHAN ROWSON, DIRECTOR, RSA SOCIAL BRAIN CENTRE

  ‘Want to discover how to be peaceful? Ed has given us pragmatic, clear and compassionate guidance that we can apply in our everyday life. The practical guidance on mindfulness is interwoven throughout with reference to the scientific underpinning, and is brought to life by following the experiences of four people who’ve journeyed through the programme.’

  REBECCA CRANE, DIRECTOR, CENTRE FOR MINDFULNESS RESEARCH AND PRACTICE, BANGOR UNIVERSITY

  ‘This wonderfully accessible guide to mindfulness is written with a clarity, openness and gentle kindness that are some of the hallmarks of mindfulness practice itself. Drawing on many of the key elements of the MBSR/MBCT course, the book also offers an introductory bridge into the rich philosophical foundations that underpin and complete mindfulness-based approaches.’

  ROBERT MARX, CONSULTANT CLINICAL PSYCHOLOGIST, LEAD FOR MINDFULNESS TRAINING AND GOVERNANCE, SUSSEX PARTNERSHIP NHS FOUNDATION TRUST

  ‘The key to lasting happiness is the ability to live in wise relation to our thoughts, feelings and surroundings. Mindfulness is a life-changing tool that helps us do this and is perhaps the ultimate life skill for living well. This book is a fabulous, insightful and accessible introduction to mindfulness from one of its leading practitioners. Highly recommended.’

  DR MARK WILLIAMSON, DIRECTOR OF ACTION FOR HAPPINESS

  ‘There’s little doubt that mindfulness is one of the most powerful remedies for the stresses of life in our distracted, hyper-busy, individualistic era. But it’s surprisingly hard to find truly practical, research-backed advice on how to do it. Ed Halliwell’s Mindfulness is an unprecedentedly clear guide to the topic, cutting through the myths and magical thinking to the essence of this ancient yet urgently relevant practice. To learn the art of living well and happily by paying attention, start by paying attention to this book.’

  OLIVER BURKEMAN, AUTHOR OF HELP, THE ANTIDOTE AND THE GUARDIAN’S ‘THIS COLUMN WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE’

  ‘With so much being written on mindfulness over recent times you could be forgiven for thinking that there is nothing new to learn. This book effectively puts paid to that assumption! Ed’s writing is clear and comprehensible, but it is not just for beginners – it is for anyone who wants to be reminded why these ancient practices continue to be so relevant to our lives today. By interweaving case studies with a week-by-week chapter structure Ed has provided a practical, accessible guide which is equally applicable to the newcomer or those of us who still struggle to incorporate mindfulness practice into our everyday lives.’

  DR JONTY HEAVERSEDGE, CO-AUTHOR OF THE MINDFUL MANIFESTO, AND CHAIR OF NHS SOUTHWARK CLINICAL COMMISSIONING GROUP

  ‘Mindfulness is an age-old practice that has proven – over millennia and across cultures – to be an effective tool for managing the stresses of everyday life and for cultivating a greater sense of presence and wellbeing. As a gifted and valued member of our teaching faculty, Ed Halliwell’s Mindfulness courses are an essential component of our core curriculum. His latest guide offers clear, practical insight and instruction for anyone interested in developing this skill.’

  MORGWN RIMEL, DIRECTOR, THE SCHOOL OF LIFE, LONDON

  Also in the Made Easy series

  The Akashic Records

  Animal Communication

  Astrology

  Chakras

  Connecting with the Angels

  Connecting with the Fairies

  Crystals

  Discovering Your Past Lives

  Energy Healing

  Feng Shui

  Goddess Wisdom

  Lucid Dreaming

  Mediumship

  Meditation

  NLP

  Numerology

  Qabalah

  Reiki

  Self-Hypnosis

  Shamanism

  Tantra

  Tarot

  Wicca

  First published and distributed in the United Kingdom by:

  Hay House UK Ltd, Astley House, 33 Notting Hill Gate, London W11 3JQ

  Tel: +44 (0)20 3675 2450; Fax: +44 (0)20 3675 2451

  www.hayhouse.co.uk

  Published and distributed in the United States of America by:

  Hay House Inc., PO Box 5100, Carlsbad, CA 92018-5100

  Tel: (1) 760 431 7695 or (800) 654 5126

  Fax: (1) 760 431 6948 or (800) 650 5115

  www.hayhouse.com

  Published and distributed in Australia by:

  Hay House Australia Ltd, 18/36 Ralph St, Alexandria NSW 2015

  Tel: (61) 2 9669 4299; Fax: (61) 2 9669 4144

  www.hayhouse.com.au

  Published and distributed in India by:

  Hay House Publishers India, Muskaan Complex, Plot No.3, B-2,

  Vasant Kunj, New Delhi 110 070

  Tel: (91) 11 4176 1620; Fax: (91) 11 4176 1630

  www.hayhouse.co.in

  Distributed in Canada by:

  Raincoast Books, 2440 Viking Way, Richmond, B.C. V6V 1N2

  Tel: (1) 604 448 7100; Fax: (1) 604 270 7161; www.raincoast.com

  Text © Ed Halliwell, 2015

  The moral rights of the author have been asserted.

  All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced by any mechanical, photographic or electronic process, or in the form of a phonographic recording; nor may it be stored in a retrieval system, transmitted or otherwise be copied for public or private use, other than for ‘fair use’ as brief quotations embodied in articles and reviews, without prior written permission of the publisher.

  The information given in this book should not be treated as a substitute for professional medical advice; always consult a medical practitioner. Any use of information in this book is at the reader’s discretion and risk. Neither the author nor the publisher can be held responsible for any loss, claim or damage arising out of the use, or misuse, of the suggestions made, the failure to take medical advice or for any material on third party websites.

  This book was previously published as Mindfulness (Hay House Basics series), ISBN: 978-1-78180-264-9

  A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.

  Trade paperback ISBN: 978-1-78817-265-3

  Ebook ISBN: 978-1-78817-281-3

  Interior illustrations © 123RF.com

  ‘If you know the point of balance, You can settle the details. If you can settle the details, You can stop running around. Your mind will become calm. If your mind becomes calm, You can think in front of a tiger. If you can think in front of a tiger, You will surely succeed.’

  MENCIUS

  Contents

  Mindfulness practices

  Introduction

  How to use this book

  PART I: LAYING FOUNDATIONS

  Chapter 1: The medicine of mindfulness

  Chapter 2: Planting seeds

  PART II: AWARENESS

  Chapter 3: Learning to look

  Chapter 4: Opening to space

  PART III: BEING WITH…

  Chapter 5: Staying embodied

 
; Chapter 6: Shifting towards

  Chapter 7: Letting go

  PART IV: CHOICE

  Chapter 8: Mindful action

  Chapter 9: Wholeness

  Recommended reading

  Further resources

  Acknowledgements

  References

  Index

  About the author

  Join the Hay House Family

  Mindfulness practices

  Coming to your senses

  Mindfulness of breathing

  Taking a breathing space

  Body scanning

  Mindfulness of body

  Mountain meditation

  Turning towards difficulty

  Mindfulness of sounds, thoughts, and choiceless awareness

  Breathing space, with action step

  Loving-kindness meditation

  Mindful walking

  STOP – a one-minute mindfulness practice

  Introduction

  In my mid-twenties, I became very stuck. I was working frantically and living hedonistically, trying to numb a nagging sense of doubt that the career and lifestyle I’d chosen were at odds with my values and aspirations. I sought happiness by chasing after pleasure and status, but the more I strived for contentment, the more it seemed out of reach. When yet another relationship fell apart, I did too, sinking into a deep and anxious depression.

  Looking back now, I see my main trouble was I didn’t know how to live well. I had very little understanding of how happiness happens – not just in terms of the activities that lead to wellbeing, but in how to work skilfully with experience itself. I had very little awareness of the patterns of thinking, feeling, relating and doing in which I was trapped, and so even when I recognized that something was wrong, I didn’t really know what it was, or what to do about it. In desperation, I tried many fixes, but none seemed to help.

  Actually, trying to get rid of my misery seemed to make it worse. Having spent years striving and running after pleasure, I was now trying to fight and run away from pain. As a wellbeing strategy, it was just as flawed. I kept going round and round, faster and faster, like a dog chasing its tail.

  After a lot of flailing around, it was suggested I learn to meditate. This was a turning point. Learning to be still and look inwards, I began to discover awareness, becoming familiar with patterns of mind and body that had unconsciously driven my behaviour. With practice, I learned it was possible – gradually and gently – to let go of being controlled by these patterns, and to develop a different way of being. A little space began to emerge, along with some relief. With this came the possibility of making new choices: ones guided by a sense of heart’s calling, which at last I could listen to. I’d begun to discover mindfulness.

  Around a dozen years after this turning point, my life feels quite different. I’ve long since left my old job, and now teach mindfulness to others. I was fortunate enough to find a partner, having learned something of what makes relationships work. From a place of despair, isolation and disconnection – of not knowing what to do or how to do it – I’ve been granted a measure of peace that previously looked unlikely.

  This seems to have come not so much from chasing after dreams but from turning towards realities, getting to know them intimately, even when they’re painful. It’s come from cultivating a new approach to living. I didn’t set out for this particular change to happen – it’s appeared as a by-product of practice over time. It’s an ongoing work-in-progress, a training that I now trust and delight in, even when it’s not easy.

  What does living well mean? Answers might come from two more questions: what is happening and how can we learn from it? If we’re unaware of what’s going on – not just at the surface of things, but in depth – then it’s difficult for us to know what drives us, and for things to change. We may find ourselves in activity, but ignorant of the processes that lead us to act, we’re doomed to repeat our habits. Unwittingly caught in our grooves, we’re sleepwalking (or more likely sleep-running) through life.

  When we start to pay attention to experience, with mindfulness, we can also begin to reflect on it. Not just by thinking, which often occurs on autopilot, but from a place of embodied understanding, an awareness of the world in and around us. This awareness can sense more deeply and spaciously the content of our lives, and also the ways we relate to it.

  As we train in working with this deeper understanding, rather than being impelled into automatic reactions, the possibility of change arises. New perspectives can come, and we can explore new behaviour. Noticing what leads to wellbeing, and what doesn’t, we can experiment with different choices. Attuning to the feedback we receive from our minds and bodies, we develop a connection with the world that can guide us through it more wisely.

  This isn’t esoteric. We can train the capacity for embodied awareness, through mindfulness practices that help us discover how to be and what to do. These ways have been known, employed and refined for thousands of years, and they’re the subject of widespread current interest because scientific research is demonstrating many of their benefits, and because the world is in need of practical ways to wisdom. The intention of this book is to introduce you to some of these practices, as well as exploring attitudes that can be usefully brought to them. I hope you will find them as beneficial as I have.

  How to use this book

  The book is organized as a week-by-week training manual, with each of the nine chapters exploring aspects of mindfulness. They include key practices, an overview of the scientific findings that point to the benefits of mindfulness, and case studies that follow the experiences of four people who’ve learned to practise in recent years.

  You can try reading one chapter per week, experimenting with the practices described in each – but it’s also fine to dip in and out, or stay with one or two practices until you feel ready to continue. Mindfulness is not a linear process, and it’s good to return to the basics and work with them over and over.

  It can be very helpful to have an audio guide for mindfulness meditation, especially in the beginning, and I’ve recorded guided versions of all the practices in this book, available to download (or order on CD) at www.edhalliwell.com.

  It’s best not to be in a rush to ‘get’ mindfulness, as mindfulness can’t be got by rushing, so please take your time. As we’ll see, this is one training where you’re encouraged not to focus on striving for results.

  A word of caution

  Sometimes, it isn’t the right time to practise meditation intensively. When we’re currently experiencing very strong feelings, moving into those feelings can feel overwhelming, especially if we’re not used to it.

  This can occur, for example, when we’re very depressed, recently bereaved, heavily addicted, or going through some major transition in our lives. In these cases, it may make sense to wait a while – to make sure you have suitable support, and to train less intensively to begin with. It’s a bit like wanting to run a marathon after breaking a leg: you’d need to allow some healing to take place before you start an exercise regime.

  If you’re in any doubt, or you feel overwhelmed when you practise, it may be worth consulting with an experienced mindfulness teacher or other health professional, to discuss the best way for you. This doesn’t mean you’re not a good candidate for training – just that the most mindful way for now might be to wait, or to work towards creating suitable conditions.

  Chapter 1

  The medicine of mindfulness

  ‘To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.’

  OSCAR WILDE

  Mindfulness brings us to our senses, enabling us to live in and with reality. As we practise opening to the senses, a new way of being can emerge within us. We develop a friendly awareness of what’s going on, and are able to learn from it.

  Walking down the street, you hear the sound of a horse’s hooves from behind. You turn to see a friend on top of the horse, which is galloping by at a furious pace. You call aft
er the friend: ‘Where are you going?’ The rider yells back: ‘I don’t know. Ask the horse!’

  Many of us live our lives like the friend in this scene: hurtling through the days, feeling driven, rather than in charge. Life may be happening, but are we really choosing our course? And when we are making choices, to what extent are they wise ones, expressing our true intent?

  The cost of relentless doing

  Surveys suggest that despite huge economic growth, people in Britain and the US are generally no happier than they were 50 years ago.1 We may even be less happy than former generations: the World Health Organization warns that by 2030 depression will create the largest burden of any illness,2 overtaking cancer, heart disease and diabetes.

  We may be richer in monetary terms, but most of us agree that ‘the pace of life and the number of things we have to do and worry about is a major cause of stress, unhappiness and illness’.3 The pressure we feel to compete and achieve, pushing harder and faster and for longer hours, doesn’t seem to lead to wellbeing, even if it produces material gains. Nevertheless, like the rider on the horse, we keep being driven, perhaps without considering where we’re headed, or why we might be going in that direction.

  With all our modern means of communication, consumption of information has increased by 350 per cent over the last three decades.4 Multi-tasking is often tried as a way to cope – if we can manage more things at once, perhaps we’ll clear the decks? But research suggests this doesn’t help; in fact, trying to multi-task reduces our productivity by as much as 40 per cent.5 We waste energy by switching our attention from one thing to the next in quick succession. As T.S. Eliot put it, well before the creation of the internet, we get ‘distracted from distraction by distraction’.

  As we become more stressed, our mental capacity decreases – we feel overwhelmed and can’t think straight. We’re relegated to paying ‘continuous partial attention’6 – a fractured, frantic way of life that only frazzles us further. Stress appears to shrink parts of the brain that help regulate mind and body functions, putting us at a greater risk of mental and physical illness.7 In trying to get everywhere faster, we actually make our journey harder, and less enjoyable.